Angela’s story – why I learnt Reiki

 

Everyone chooses to learn Reiki for different reasons. Here, one of my students shares why she was drawn to learn Reiki and the impact it has had on her.

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“I had been reading a book on Reiki and felt drawn towards it. I had never had a Reiki session but I just knew it would be something that I would get a lot of benefit from.

I found Becci Godfrey on an on line search and arranged my first Reiki session with her, I also wanted to learn more about it and enquire about taking my level 1.

When I first met Becci, I found her to be a very warm caring person, and was able to relate well to her. We talked about what I was hoping Reiki could do for me and also how I felt I could help other people.

I was very nervous and my anxiety levels were sky high (which Becci picked up during Reiki) I really wasn’t sure what to expect. The session actually went by really quickly and I was surprised at how much heat I could feel through Becci’s hands.

When the session had finished, Becci said that my body felt really unbalanced and I was carrying a lot of stress-which I knew, but didn’t know what to do about it. I did feel a lot calmer and really tired afterwards. Becci gave me a lot of good advice on what to do for the rest of the day and how I may feel etc. She also recommended I have another session the following week.

When I got home, my energy levels were so high, I hadn’t felt like that for a long time and I achieved a lot that afternoon. I felt very balanced for the first time in years and couldn’t wait to go back for my next session.

I had 4 sessions in all and could totally feel the difference in my body. My anxiety levels dropped right down and I just felt very different. I was able to feel calmer about things and felt a peacefulness inside me.

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Naomi and Angela receive their Level 1 certificates

Due to my positive experience I then went on to do my level 1. This was 2 days where I learnt all about the basics in Reiki and how to treat someone and how to self-treat which has been hugely beneficial to me. I did a 21 day cleansing programme where I used Reiki either on myself or other people every day and I ate and drank sensibly, plus used relaxation ideas to help myself too.

I am still practicing Reiki on friends and family and I’m looking forward to doing my level 2 as well, where I can develop my Reiki skills into helping other people so that they can feel the benefits and start to feel better about themselves too.

I will be keeping up with reiki sessions for myself as I find each time I go I feel so much better both physically and mentally.”

Angela

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20170110 Becci Barbara Yeo Photography hr-30 (2)About Becci:

I am passionate about your health and wellbeing and Reiki and from my own experience and the experiences of others, Reiki has a lot of potential for delivering health and relaxation, particularly when other methods have failed.

If Angela’s story has inspired you and you are curious to see what Reiki has to offer or you would like to learn Reiki for yourself, then get in touch to book a session or read this post to find out who Reiki is For.

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Who is Reiki for?

Young or young at heart, anyone can experience Reiki

Reiki is suitable for anyone. The young, the still young at heart, happy people, sad people, those that are well and those feeling below par.

You don’t need much of an excuse to experience Reiki as having all that the Universe can offer is your birthright! 

Most people come to support themselves through difficult times or let go of an old pattern. Some come for simple wellbeing. 

Those that learn Reiki for themselves find it helps them stay balanced and deal with life stress, help with sleeping and gives them a positive spiritual practice that enriches their life.

I like Reiki because it helps me to be who I am fully.

What’s your reason for doing Reiki?

What’s it like to have hands that heal?

‘Tis the Christmas season (Merry Christmas all!) and some chance for some down time! This means time with loved ones, friends and family and a lot more time to relax and go slow. I LOVE this time, when many are on a break and the country just seems to slow down a bit, go inwards and do repair work.

Merry Christmas everyone!

So in this resting, inwards time, it’s unsurprising that I find myself drawn to self treat and support my loved ones more. As they relax and unwind from a hectic year gone at full pace, I find that Reiki is a perfect way to supercharge their recovery, deal with things that couldn’t be deal with when the pressure was on, and set people up to be successful for the days, weeks, months, years ahead.

But what is it like to have ‘magic’ hands as some describe them. We aside from being ‘pretty awesome’,  here’s what I experience when I treat.

Empathy

First off, I know straight away what a person feels like on the surface layers at least, when I meet them. I am very empathic, which means I quick connect into the thoughts, feelings and emotions of a person that is open and willing to share them. This instantly gives me a lot of data about where their challenges lie, what support they need and whether what I offer can provide anything of value.

Next, I’ll often find mySelf drawn to a particular place or area. This may appear to be unrelated to the issue they present with; I have long found to learn and trust my intuition as too many times to count, it has served me well.

Next, I power up my hands with the Reiki symbols before I start by scanning the energy of an area to see what I can feel and experience. With a physical condition I may choose to do this hands on as I find a person’s body can give me a vast amount of data about what is going on where. For example, I can often easily go straight to an area of discomfort or pain without even being told there is an issue through simple intuitive knowing. You learn to trust it in time. Just yesterday I was helping my husband with his back problem and intuitively knew we needed to work with the hip flexors and lower abdominal muscle first. It turned out that those too were sore, though he had not mentioned them. It was only when I had worked with them first would the Reiki/my guidance allow me to on and treat the most vulnerable bit near the spine. The whole thing was like peeling the layers of an onion, peeling back layer after layer of imbalances – all being guided by my hands that were acting like stethoscopes and able to listen to what was going on.

Conversely, if the problem is in the outer energetic layers then I will treat with my hands away from their body, sometimes clearing and sweeping away old and stagnant energy and constantly monitoring what I am noticing and feeling so I can adapt and change my strategy.

When treating, particularly when I am doing hands on work, my hands can get very warm. I notice this myself and sometimes my clients comment on it too. I take this to mean a sign that wholeness (healing) is happening, and to keep going till I get the feeling the treatment is done.

Don’t ask me how any of this works, I don’t know, I just know that something happens!

All over wellbeing

Finally, I may just place my hands on an area that is easy to get to, to give a general all over body sense of wellbeing. Not all Reiki is needed or requested to heal a particular condition or problem, some just love receiving Reiki because it tops them up, gives them lots of resources to cope with life with or it feels good. My cat Amy definitely falls in the later category! Despite being well and generally healthy, she’s been going for all the Reiki she can get! It is a lovely experience to give Reiki, so so long as I’ve the capability, I’ve been happy to oblige.

Amy, the cat, is loving receiving Reiki any time she can!

For me though, Reiki is a whole body experience with my hands both being the listening instrument (along with my energy field and my intuition), and one the main receptacles through which Reiki is given.

It’s absolutely joyous to notice and experience the changes that are going on underneath your hands, and the changes in the thoughts, feelings and behaviours of the person and/or animal after. Win -win!!

Set boundaries

Whilst a very easy thing to do (which is why I like it), Reiki does require some effort. I find it valuable to have good listening skills and actively seek on a daily basis to improve my ability to be present. The fact that it takes effort is something I honour and respect. This is important when around those that have not yet yet developed the being present/aware skill. This is because you may find yourself inundated with healing requests. Whilst this may be fun and boost your ego at first, if you give in and always put someone elses needs before your own you gift soon so becomes devalued and unappreciated, and you become drained. The best way to deal with this is to set clear boundaries on what you are and are not willing to do, and when you must stop to meet your own energy and healing requirements. It is important in such situations that you come first, and you share what is surplus to your requirements. It is never wise to be wrapped up in someone else’s needs, hoping that one day they’ll repay you.

Finally, a little word about animals. Highly perceptive beings, whether they know you or not, they will often come and ask for healing if they know you are capable. I find in these cases I decide what I am willing to share with them and organise something that is of mutual gain. Many Reiki healers will tell you that they are very drawn to treat areas of imbalance where it is clear that Reiki could help. However, it is important to remember we have no right to enter another’s space without their permission. Similarly, no being is allowed into our space without our permission.

We may be highly gifted people, but it is up to us how we work with it.

To find out more about Reiki Treatments or learning to give Reiki yourself go to the What to expect or Learn Reiki sections.

What Reiki isn’t

I fully understand that the concept of Reiki to some is entirely new and a bit strange! After all, no-one brought me up with the idea that everything is made of energy and that at will, I could shape, channel or direct energy – so when I learnt about this concept, I found it strange too.

It is therefore completely understandable that if people aren’t familiar and don’t understand what Reiki is, leaving them to have some misguided guided perceptions. Here are some of the most common and an explanation of why they’re not true:

1) Reiki is evil

A strong misconception to start with I grant you, but a prevalent one nonetheless. There are some myths out there that to engage in the practice of Reiki is to invite in dark forces or to align yourself with the devil. Whilst doing those two things may be possible (I wouldn’t know, I haven’t tried) Reiki is far from evil. A more palatable word to the western world instead of Reiki might be Universal Life Force Energy (the Japanese translation of the word Rei-Ki) or LOVE, because that is what the experience is. When I treat someone I get an experience of being deeply present and drawing down energy/love for the participants body to use as it sees fit. I cannot shape this energy at my will, I can only be a conduit of it.

Some religions have branded Reiki as evil, and I can only imagine that is because it conflicts with their belief system. Reiki doesn’t need belief to work, and for some, the universal life force energy is the same as God’s energy. In all my experience though, I’ve never found Reiki to have a bad side to it ever – only those that interpret it that way.

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2) Reiki is a cure-all 

Never should the words Reiki and “cure” be used in the same sentence. Reiki does not cure – Reiki is a aid to learning, growing and healing. Reiki takes you on a journey that could help you to heal and become whole again (to have no hidden or resisted parts but your totality embraced in love – even your shadows), but Reiki does not cure.

People often want Reiki to cure them when they don’t want to confront their shadows and when they don’t want to have the consequences of not doing that either (i.e. illness, bad relationships).

Reiki knows that life is a) a series of experiences and b) the only influence we have over that is how we roll with those experiences. Do we resist, or do we go with the flow? If we resist, the experience sticks around until we get totality of what that experience is trying to show us. This is why you hear about people experiencing repeat failed relationships, persistent health challenges or stuck in jobs they hate – they do not yet realise they keep recreating the same pattern. If we go with the flow our resources, awareness and abilities expand. We become even more aligned with the present moment and even more in flow with what is around us. It does not guarantee us more money, creativity, or health, but it does give us a sense of growth and moving forwards, which is one of the 7 human needs.

In addition, sometimes it is not right for a person to loose their symptoms. It may be that a particular set of symptoms or life circumstances teaches that person set of skills that cannot be got any other way, or takes them in a direction they would not otherwise.  There is so little we know compared to the infinite knowledge of Reiki, so it is important to keep an open mind and be grateful for what we have. Learning to deal with life’s ups and downs is often the making of a person, so be aware how little we know on the conscious level and stay innocent.

3) Reiki is an alternative to conventional medical care 

No and no on this one, on two accounts. 1) You would never choose Reiki instead of speaking to your health practitioner, as the two are quite different things. A health practitioner is trained to diagnose, Reiki healers are not. Health practitioners are also trained to give appropriate medication, which Reiki healers are not! One does not replace the other. These are two quite separate approaches, both equally valid and both born from the essence of love. Knowing the benefits and likely outcomes from each one will help you make an informed decision on which is right for you at the time, whilst being responsible for your Self. 2) On the second account, I personally have never seen Reiki as alternative. Currently the word alternative is used to distinguish it from conventional medicine but let’s be honest, hands on healing and Reiki was around well before our relationship with drug-based medicine to restore health. If I must distinguish it, I would label it traditional, but in reality, I would prefer to see all approaches integrated in a holistic approach of mind, body and soul. A combined approach is often great in many circumstances, as it allows for the best of both worlds.

4) Reiki is a relaxation technique 

gassho-2I share this one because I think calling Reiki purely a relaxation technique sells it a little short. Whilst for some Reiki is deeply relaxing, that isn’t the experience for everyone and it does so much more. The purpose of Reiki is to draw in Universal Life Force Energy to restore harmony and balance either to yourself of others. Your various physical, mental and spiritual energetic bodies may use this energy in a myriad of different ways. For some this energy will be used for wound repair or healing of broken bones, whilst for others this may be used to fuel the courage to face our demons or say goodbye to deceased loved ones. What I love about Reiki healing is how clever that Universal Energy is. The healer does very little except to be the conduit for this energy, sending it where and for as long as they sense they must.

In addition, the actual resonance of the energy we draw down is dependent on the person we are treating and what their requirements are to bring them into balance. This means even the most novice of healers can bring about change so long as they allow the energy to flow through. An experiment on the frequencies emitted from a Reiki healers hands showed that broken bones drew down a different frequency to soft tissue issues. It is this deep intelligence that is beyond the intellect of the human mind that makes Reiki so applicable to many scenarios and so easy to get a good outcome.

5) Reiki is only for illness

Reiki is well known for illness and emotional problems, but it is not the only time it can be used. As mentioned before, Reiki is a deepening of awareness and presence – and this deepening can be applied to all sorts of scenarios. This could be an exam or important meeting, your day so you get the most out of it, food so it is as healthy nourishing and vibrant as it can be, plants, pets and animals to aid their wellbeing, your home to clear out any negative energy or technology to reduce its impact on you. The possibilities are endless – something we talk about out when you learn Level one.

6) Some forms of Reiki are more powerful than others

Reiki as a form of healing and spiritual enlightenment has been around for a while (since 1992), and now appears across the globe as many types – western/Usui, Angelic and Seichem to mention  few. Whilst there is one form that is known as the directly taught form – Jikiden, Reiki is Reiki. Each different form of teaching is simply using different approaches to the same end game. If looking to learn or experience Reiki, pick the one that resonates with you with a person that resonates with you as this will be more influential than the technique.

7) Reiki is an easy experience and a way of avoiding reality

This Reiki most definitely is not! Reiki makes you far more aware and open to reality and thus it gives you the journey it gives you! A Reiki experience is a deepening of awareness and connection to what already is, helping you to confront the things you must to move forwards. Yes, many people experience Reiki as a lovely calming experience, but for those that is serves, it is important to know that Reiki will also likely result in stress being released from the body.  This might be in the form of feeling coolness, heat, tingling, pulsations, experiencing memories, feeling emotional, needing to address a situation, interesting dreams or feeling different to usual.

These experiences are a great indication that the energy is doing its work and shifts are being made. Getting support through a transition period like this is critical, just as you would expect to handle life differently if you were living through a house regeneration project. Some disruption is to be expected, but if you persist with a plan, then ultimately a good outcome is to be expected too. I always think that Reiki takes you closer to the truth – so perhaps if you’re not yet ready to handle that, stay away from Reiki till you are!

 

When done correctly, Reiki is a fun and enjoyable experience. There is nothing wrong with saying a person or approach doesn’t work for you if it doesn’t – this is your journey and it is important you take responsibility for that. For many though, that have taken that journey, I am confident that all would say “go for it!” – there is much to be gained.


wpid-dsc_0005.jpgReiki Mark Cross, is run and led by Teacher and Master Practitioner, Becci Godfrey. Situated in the beautiful Sussex countryside, people come to let go of their stress, activate their healing abilities within and become the person they were destined to be.

More about Reiki.

More about Becci.

More about training in Reiki with Reiki Mark Cross.

Reiki – why bother?

In a fast paced world, it seems almost everyone is pressurised for time. Deadlines, commitments, jobs, bills, expectations- just to keep pace with the life we have can feel like enough to do, let alone embark on a new journey of exploring our potential within.

So why, when everyone is so pressured for time, would we bother to ‘add in’ the practice of Reiki?

I believe I have the answer.

Eat sleep work repeatThere comes a time in your life, when you sense there is something more. You feel like your current ideas of the world are perhaps not enough, there is more to life than:

 

eat, sleep, work and repeat

Perhaps you are not happy in your job or your marriage, or perhaps you are experiencing a health condition, or a loved one is. Historically you might have turned to retail therapy, drink, drugs, excessive exercise – except that just feels like it wouldn’t cut it anymore. Or perhaps it never did, you just always knew there was a better way, though you never knew what that was.

This is the beginning. This is when you are beginning to be open to something that is beyond what you can see; something that can only be sensed, felt, intuitively heard. You may notice there are strange synchronicities going on in your life; you might find yourself extra sensitive to the thoughts and feelings of others or you may find yourself frustrated by the lack of support out there.

Reiki is the Universal energy that pervades us all. It’s the energy that everything is made from, from the chair we sit on, to the organs in our bodies to our thoughts, feelings and emotions. It is the energy we create our dreams from, we experience the feelings of love and connection through and we give to others when we comfort, console or celebrate and endorse. We are energetic beings, and Reiki is the word given to the energy that is in and around us all.

So the reason I bother with Reiki is because I wanted to be at one and a friend of the energy that I was surrounded with, rather than victim to a force I was unaware of and had no influence over.

The question inspired me to reach out to my friends, and ask them, what benefits they had got from either training in or experiencing Reiki. Here are some of the answers they gave:

  • A greater awareness of my energy and of the energy around me
  • To replenish dwindling energy, to balance my energy, to give me calm, to help with certain pains, knees, chest etc
  • A course of reiki treatments cured my anxiety which had been causing shortness of breath for months!
  • Helps with insomnia not to mention feeling better than a massage!
  • Feel so relaxed while either giving Reiki or receiving it and can never give or receive enough it just recharges my batteries
  • Better sleep
  • Healing of burns and cuts
  • Reduces stress
  • Reduces pain
  • Quicker recovery from illness and injury
  • A more holistic perspective on life
  • A deeper understanding on the way we are, which helps with staying well and handling the stress of life.

I loved their answers.

I’ve seen people experience dramatic changes as a result of reconnecting to the energy they are made from, whilst for others it is a deepening of their connection to Self -an experience that many describe as deeply relaxing.

So why do I recommend people bother with Reiki? Because you owe it to your Self to put your needs before others. We’re all born with an inbuilt ability to heal, be intuitively driven and life a life full of purpose and passion. Reiki for me has been the vehicle to get there and a source of continuing personal development. Could it be yours?


wpid-dsc_0005.jpgReiki Mark Cross, is run and led by Teacher and Master Practitioner, Becci Godfrey. Situated in the beautiful Sussex countryside, people come to let go of their stress, activate their healing abilities within and become the person they were destined to be.

More about Becci.

More about training with Reiki Mark Cross.

Innocence

I have been playing with the idea of INNOCENCE today.

By that I mean not knowing (or thinking I know) how things are going to turn out, letting go of my pre-occupation with the next moment and fully experiencing this moment in all its deep and diverse richness.

Innocence requires you to go really slowly because there is so much to take in.

Innocence also spreads your attention far and wide, which activates the parasympathetic nervous system, which is where all healing takes place from.

Innocence doesn’t mean you drop a wisdom, it just means you don’t know what is going to happen next, which means you open yourself up to the possibility of it being anything.

   Being judgemental isn’t innocent.
   Worrying isn’t innocent.
   Labelling people isn’t innocent.

   Being open and receptive is innocent.
   Seek first to understand and then be understood (Covey) is being innocent.
   Forgiveness is innocent.

So for today, I’m going to play out not knowing is going to happen and being innocent, because I bet whatever does is grander and more exciting than anything I could have imagined.

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The emotional benefits of Reiki

What could you do with freely experiencing so you can move on and let it go?
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In my experience, many do not fully appreciate the emotional cleansing capacity of a good Reiki therapist. Reiki is a powerful and effective way of processing emotions and letting go of past and difficult experiences. Coupled with good talking therapy skills, a Reiki therapist can make a dramatic difference to a person’s life by allowing them to confront what would be difficult to confront alone.

Emotions are energy in motion, designed to flow through the body and provide a particular response to an experience to increase our chances of staying alive. The reason that people still carry these emotions from these difficult experiences is because they weren’t fully acknowledged and processed at the time – resulting as the energy of them being carried in the body as unfinished business. These stuck emotions are often the very basic emotions of hurt, anger, fear and sadness that are linked to our survival.

Stuck emotions show up in many ways; gut issues, hearing loss, back pain, insomnia, fear of moving forwards, self sabotage at work, paranoia, slow healing rates and eating disorders to name just a few.

In order to process these difficult and survival-linked emotions so we can let our nervous system return to resting/normal we need as much support as we are experiencing stress.

I personally find a well trained, balanced and secure Reiki healer wonderfully supportive, as they allow me to open up and explore the challenges that make me vulnerable. In doing so I am able to let those vulnerabilities go and I become more secure, present and grounded in the process. In doing that, I become more alert and aware, better able to defend myself and more able to deal with my day to day stress.

If this sounds like something you would like to know more about and to see if Reiki would be right for you then I’d be very happy to chat to you about it. You can contact me on 01892 853518 or visit my website at http://www.ReikiMarkCross.co.uk to find out more.

Distance Healing: What is it and why do it?

One of the joys of being a Reiki Level 2 practitioner, and above is that you are trained in the art of Distance Healing; but what is Distance Healing, and why would you do it or why would you ask for it?

For starters, Distance Healing is exactly what it says, you send healing to a person, place or thing that is not in your immediate vacinity. This might be a friend or relative in another town, a natural disaster in another country or a pet or wild animal a couple of meters away. The practice enables you to be a channel for healing when you wouldn’t otherwise be able to because of distance, increasing the number of situations to which you can be a vessel for good and send positive vibrations.

When we teach Distance Healing at Level 2, we explore the incredible capacity humans (and animals) have to transcend space and time. Distance Healing works on the premise that everything is energy and our consciousness is everywhere, thus connecting us to all that is. This enables the heeler to energetically locate and connect to the heelee as if they were both in the same place together.

There are several ways Distance Healing can be done. One is to project or beam the healing to the person or place by energetically locating them through a prop such as their full name, date of birth and/or a photo, the other is to imagine them in the room with you and/or use a surrogate item such as a Teddy Bear or your upper thigh.

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A Teddy Bear can be useful aid for Distance Healing

The later can be an easier way to pick up the subtle energies of what is going on for a person as the Bear or leg behaves is if it is giving you feedback whereas the former way is most appropriate to remain protected when sending healing to an area or person experiencing conflict.

There are obvious reasons why you would do and experience Distance Healing such as :

▫a shortness of time
▫an inability to travel
▫emergency situation
▫when it’s not appropriate or possible for you to be there in person
▫when the person, place or thing is far away
▫when you want to send energy non-specifically to a large area or a large item.

I have been lucky enough to have given and received plenty of Distance Healing. When receiving it, it can often feel like a sense of overall warmth and love – it is most certainly a magical experience. When giving Distance Healing I have been amazed at the accuracy of the issues I have picked up such as emotional states, area of tension, injuries and even that someone who unbeknownst to me ground their teeth and had issues with their left jaw!

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Distance healing can be an effective way to deal with difficult experiences

 

Distance Healing also has the benefit of the recipient being able to stay in their own home or receive healing whilst in a location such hospital or prison. It can be used to support nervous children at school, athletes, performing musicians and those sitting exams.

If you would be interested in experiencing Distance Healing, I run 30 minute to 1hr sessions with a follow up email after. If you are interested in learning Distance Healing then you will need to be Reiki Level 1 trained and have demonstrated a good basic understanding of Reiki and how it operates. For more information on treatments and training opportunities visit www.ReikiMarkCross.co.uk or contact us.

Reiki for first timers

Such a delight to share what Reiki is to a first timer today.

How do you describe Reiki to someone that has never had it or anything like it before, but trusts you and is desperate for some help with their pain?

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The answer is, you don’t. You explain enough to let them know what’s expected of them and what they might experience and then you let yourself be guided by intuition and the healing do it’s thing.

As Reiki practitioners you don’t have to have all the answers, you just have to listen and be in the moment.

Our bodies are talking to us all the time, telling us where we’re going against our wishes, when our burdens have got too much to bear alone, when we’re frightened to move forwards and when we’re more upset than we really let on.

When we listen to our bodies we get insights into where to go next, what we love, what sustains us and what resources to invest in.

I’m not special
It takes no special skill to do this, I am not ‘gifted’ in any way, I simply liked the idea of being able to do this, so I trained up so I could. It really is that simple.

I sent today’s client home with a leaflet so she can read up on what she has just experienced. If it is right she’ll come back and have more, and if it isn’t, she won’t.

Despite what some people say, there is no set way anyone has to deal with their challenges and I’ve never seen it written anywhere we have to deal with our challenges at all – because, and this is the most important point to remember at all – we are already perfect, just as we are.

Do you Love yourself?

Today’s client came because she was having a tough time going through a particularly challenging divorce and the stress was making her unwell.

We’re 6 sessions into a block of 9. Each one has been peeling back a layer of ineffective coping mechanisms that has enabled her to survive with the resources she had but has also kept her stuck and caused her much pain.

Today we hit the bottom of the biggest unravelling of all – the question of “Do I love me?”

Without love you’ll never do the necessary work to survive, you’d give up and let circumstances take you.
She quite readily admitted she’d grown up in a loveless environment and had spent her whole adult life seeking love outside of her Self. It had never occurred to her whether she loved her Self or not.

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I’ve sent her off with the homework to go discover whether she does or not.
Sometimes we’ve taken on so many ideas and beliefs from others it’s easy to come to the conclusion we’re unlovable, especially if it happened early in life. Knowing no better we simply copy the behaviours of those around us.

We treat ourselves with the same contempt, criticism, indifference and ingratitude we are familiar with from our childhood. It’s not that are parents were bad people, it’s just they didn’t know how important it was to love things as they were, choosing instead to focus on us getting a good education, excelling at a musical instrument or sport or getting a well paid job. These are worthy things, but unsustainable sources of love without a strong foundation of Self Love.

Self Love helps you to make decisions in your best interest rather than in the interest of the people around you.

To healthy people Self Love makes you very attractive and someone people like to be around.

However, Self Love doesn’t always make you popular. Sometimes, if we are surrounded by people that rely on us for their sense of identity, then our Self Love would be very threatening to them, because you might leave them – and then they would have to experience deal with the emptiness they experience because they don’t love themselves either. These people can have devious and manipulative ways to get you to stay. They make it out you are as free as a bird to do what you like, but you are not. They use tactics as feining illness, guilt or criticism to make you feel inadequate or to show you how much your behaviour hurts and harms them.

Don’t be fooled! The most loving thing we can do is this situation is lead the way on role modelling Self Love.

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Self Love seeks life enriching experiences and life enriching company. Self love tells people no and sets boundaries. Self Love listens to your instincts and champions being your own biggest advocate. Self Love listens to you own inner voice more than those of others. Self Love knows when to stop and when you are being too easy on yourself. Finally, Self Love knows you are worthy and never gives up on you.

At the end of the day the truth is, to get by in life, Self Love is all you have.